The River

Fall here, lay here

Face up towards the sky

I remind myself

No matter how far I extend my arm

I’m never going to reach it

I’m weighed down to this cold hard earth

Red rivers flow down my skin

The tributaries branching  out to my farthest limb

Covered in the worst part of me

I will die here

I try to pretend there’s a reason to fight

My arms want to pick me up

My mind won’t let them try

And even if I could raise my hand

Drenched with blood

With hate


And try to clean myself

I know I would only smear the evidence

Deeper into my skin

And there’s no reason to go on

I will die here

I want to think a figure will come

Loom out of the shadows

In between the trees

To save me

Take me to the river

And wash me off,  cleanse what I am

But every second of silence that lingers on

Of this indescribable suffering

Just leads me closer

To ending it here

I will bleed out


I will not run


I would fall

Either way

You don’t care


And these veins that pump my hate further in

That lead on this miserable march

On this dampened darkened lonesome night

Could only serve me one more purpose

To crumble in anxiety

To release and let the metal slide

And flow until

The river dries

I will die here


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